Abner?

Oh, I don't know about that. I'm pretty sure I've developed a keto phobia.

 

You mean to say that Johann is not your real name? I'm so disillusioned.

 

C’mon Ted, we know that Ted is not your real name.

 

My real name is Theodore Lamar Heiks.

 

Man, everything online is getting monetized.

 

Abner is awesome and Kim is cool and beautiful. They are old school punk rockers and right there, that puts them head and shoulders above 90% of the population. The world is a more colorful place with them in it.

 

So am I, Ted - but the name Johann wasn't exactly in the top ten for English boys born during World War II. Neither were Adolf, Hermann or Heinrich, IIRC.

But back in the early 50s, when I arrived at school in Canada, there were boys with names like Manfred, Volkert and Helmar - new arrivals, as I was - but from post-war Germany. We were all the same - evil young boys, so I learned all the BAD words in German from them, years before I learned the GOOD ones in school as a teenager. My real name is John - Johann is the same name and is what my German teacher called me in school. Just like my French teacher called me Jean, my Latin teacher called me Iohannes, my Italian teacher called me Gianni, My Mandarin teacher called me Tang Guo Qiang, my wonderful Mexican profesora called me Juan and my Ukrainian teacher called me Ivan - and my Greek teacher called me Ιωαννης (Ioannes). My Mohawk teacher just called me John.