Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

Hello,

Wow...did I just get spanked or what? LOL...thanks for the encouragement. I'll try to keep these ideas you've presented in mind. I know my situation is no where near as bad as yours, but it still bugs the heck out of me as to where I am in life right now.

- S.

 

Losing the "umph": Been there.

Shawn, HANG IN THERE! It's a worthwhile pain in the butt!

After 5 stops-and-starts, I finally earned my Bachelor's degree at the age of 40 (I started at age 30). That final year was a true test of my will -- it all seemed so pointless then. But having the degree proved to be important for my self-esteem, healing a long buried sense of inadequacy from childhood (OK, I'll get off of the therapist's couch now).

Whatever reason you have for earning your degree, just know that it may have a much deeper personal meaning for you than simple career or worldly advancement. If you stop this close to the finish line I'm afraid you'll always regret it.

 

Have you ever wondered whether you have a bad case of Attention Defecit Disorder or was this just a case of youthful screwing around?

 

My dude,

What you do is this. Kick back, relax, take a chill pill, and rent yourself a full run of "Rocky" videos or DVDs. The next time you go in for an exam, visualize a capacity crowd at Madison Square Gardens cheering you on as you get ready to kick ass on that next exam while the band plays "Gonna Fly Now" and "Eye of the Tiger"! Good luck!

 

Nothing quite so esoteric, I'm afraid. It stands for Dodge City vegan.

s&f,
dcv
Spes mea in Deo est

 

Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

Hello,

Unproven, suspected, mild case of the first..."major illness" of the second. That, and awesome dysfunctional family dynamics which screwed up my head to the point where thinking was next to impossible. When I finally got away from my parents, I was able to center myself and get to work once again (hence the five year hiatus from school until I turned 28).

-S.

 

Get a hold of your tanscripts, if you haven't already memorized your grades. Then start computing how many more A's your need to bring 'er up to a B average.

 

Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

Already in the mix. Excelsior College will give me a good idea of that when they evaluate my present work.

- S.

 

Re: Losing the "umph": Been there.

I believe you and Are almost in the exact position Ms. Blanc. I hope to get my B.A. next year, I will be 40. So what?, I am 39, but I feel 18. Anyway, I am primarily doing this for self satisfaction. I received an A.A. in 1988, and have pretty much been a perpetual student ever since. My A.A. and classes in various disciplines has helped me immensely. I have several awards, certificates, etc. in my profession. At this point, I don't really need a B.A. However, I am doing it to satisfy myself. My brother received his MBA from Pepperdine at 25 or 26, my little sister recieved her B.S. from Cal Poly Pomona at 22. Talk about feeling inadequate! Anyway, I plan on hopefully completing my B.A. next year. My real dream is to go the the graduation and have my wife and parents watch me receive my Degree! Whenever I get tired or grumpy, I visualize this dream, and it gives me new strength.

Anyway, the moral of this story is NEVER GIVE UP! I certainly never will. You can do it and I can do it!!!!

Take care,

Abner

 

Re: Re: Losing the "umph": Been there.

Wasn't there a story about Prime Minister Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill giving a graduation speech. The entire speech was rather mercifully short, consisting of only nine words. The aging PM strolled up to the podium and thindered, "NEVER GIVE UP!" And then there was a long, pregnant silence. "NEVER GIVE UP!" This again was followed by yet another pregnant silence. And again, Churchill inveighed, "NEVER GIVE UP!"

 

Re: Re: Re: Losing the "umph": Been there.

I believe you are right Ted. This is a saying that has stuck with me a long time. I started Martial Arts training at 10 years old, My instructor would yell "MORE POWER" or if I got knocked down he would yell "GET UP, and NEVER GIVE UP!!!". One day, after a very strong yelling session directed at me, the class was over, everybody bowed out, and left. As I was leaving, My sagacious instructor asked me, "Abner, Do you know why I am constantly on your back?, Do you ever wonder why I yell at you so much?, but not the others? I said "No, sir, I do not". He said "Because you take whatever I dish out, you have great potential". The others will leave soon enough, you keep coming back, no matter what. This may seem like a harsh lesson, but it taught me a life long lesson - "NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!"

Take care buddy!


Abner

 

I want to thank everyone for responding (thus far, in the event there are others). Your thoughts, stories, and feedback have been good to offer me a chance to see that I am not alone...a feeling that I have carried for a long time.

I want to also just entertain a crazy idea. Some of you may quit responding, but this is my emotional side coming through. I'm putting this out there, so that I will have been able to say that I said it, and move on. It is this: I want to get my degree without one more single class, no more papers, and without the need to qualify in any standardized way. In effect, a degree of value for nothing or next to nothing more needing to be done at all, and have the diploma back dated to the year of when I was 22....LOL! I mean, whats 120 credits (semester) or 180 credits (quarter hour equivalent) in real terms anyway? Its not like if I had 119 semester credits I would really have less of a degree than if I had the full 120. These seemingly arbitrary numbers are insane - more insane than my idea itself. And all of my trials from my youth should count for something in the way of sympathy to getting a degree...right? Apparently not.

There...I said it. See the stress coming through? I hope Excelsior College has good news for me in the way of how much of this I have to endure to move on with my life.

- S.

 

Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

Well, yes, it does make for a nice fantasy to wish that one could "rewind the clock" and "re-write one's life."

1. I guess it would be nice if I could have pieces of paper saying that I have an MA in Mediaeval History from the University of Colorado (backdated to 1988) and a PhD in Mediaeval History from Harvard University (backdated to 1991). There are places that that could be arranged. They're these outfits called "diploma replacement services" and many are shady operators that don't seem to ask too many questions. Then, of course, there's the problem with verification. So, not a good idea. But, even at my geriatric age, I guess I can still put that MA and PhD in History on the wall the old-fashioned way - by busting my hump for it.

2. Then, of course, I would have liked to have been an history professor for the last fourteen years and have the salary and accumulated assets commensurate therewith. Well, I can't too much worry about the last fourteen years now, but I can send out my resume to Terra Community College (Fremont, Ohio) and Owens Community College (Toledo, Ohio) and see if I can get an interview for an adjunct professorship in business (and hopefully I don't miss my voice mail message asking me to come in for the interview this go-round - last time I was in the hospital getting circumsized and by the time I had listened to my voice mail, someone else had already been hired for the position).

3. I wish that I could have been married for the last fourteen years (preferably to a wife that doesn't beat me up & then have me arrested for it - which, by the way, is why I was only married for seven months and three weeks) and have three kids, ages 13, 11, and 8. Well, I can't do much about not having been married for 13 1/2 of the last 14 years, but I sure can attempt to figure out what I might need to do to make myself reasonably attractive potential husband material and find a future wife. As to the possibility of kids, I can always go to the adoption agency when I'm ready.

4. Yes, sometimes life sucks. Believe you me, for most of my three years as a drill press operator, I truly wondered whether some wimpy little boy virgin 25-to-28-year-old college boy was truly man enough to be dealing with a bunch of f***ing hard dirty steel all day, every day.

My point in all this is: you can't change the past, but you can learn from it, and you can change the future! Good luck!

 

Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

I have thought the same thing many times, but then I think...I am a better person today for the expeienced I had in the past. Everything I did made me who I am today and I like ME. If I would have taken a different path, I would be in a different place and maybe I would not like that place.

See my point? Be happy with what you have done exactly the way you did it. That is WHO you are.

 

Re: Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

Thanks!

- S.

 

yep - never too late I say... I'm in my early 30's, married, two kids and a full time job and I didn't have a degree - so I thought I'd start one - and did

I'm glad I found FHSU but let me tell you taking 4 courses when you have two small kids and work FT is no easy task... at least not over the Summer when the courses are condensed into 8 weeks... I'm starting to fell the toll now

Perserverance is the key - you're a heck of a lot closer to finally getting your degree than I am - man you can see the light at the end of the tunnel - I've barely entered the tunnel!

(Now it's 2:30 am - I worked 10 hours ( 1200-2200 and did homework for the past 3 hours... sleep? LOTS of time to sleep when you're dead! ))

Good luck on your 3rd Degree in Bluelodge - how is the studying coming for that?

 

I want to pose a question in this thread that has made me think for some time now. Why does the education system in this country have to be so tough? It does not need to be.

I mean, we have all these strange requirements (x number of credits, certain requirements, caliber of courses, etc.), that we get bogged down with doing all this stuff and it could be made simplier. College or even school in general, does not have to be tough. But for some strange reason it is tough. Even new information could be taught in such a way that no one struggles.

Any thoughts?

- S.

 

Earning a degree later in life

I started college at the age of 29. I had been married for ten years and had a new born baby and two other young children when I started. Because my marriage was failing, I needed a change in my life and that is what started this ball rolling. I earned my BS degree at age 33. By doing it through Empire State College, I didn’t need to attend traditional classes until my final year when I took teaching methods and student teaching. During that last year, I had to take my kids to a babysitter. I hated the experience of taking my kids to a babysitter. Having less money and being home with my kids was well worth it for me. I did well in high school and even if I had went to college in a traditional sense, I would have been a dedicated student and I would not have been a partier. I did not believe I could afford college and I did not have a supportive family so I really didn't consider it very much, I guess. Even though I was "good at school" and graduated 4th in my high school class, I put in little effort and hated homework. I love learning and I loved being recognized for grades but I would rather learn what I want to learn instead of something that bores me. Because I went into teaching, I had to get a Master’s Degree. Again it was not fun but something I had to do to keep my job, and move toward a specific future goal. Though I did get personal satisfaction from earning my degrees, I don’t believe I would pursue higher education for that reason alone. I had to have a concrete career goal that required the degree. Referring back to the quote at the beginning of this post, I do not regret not getting my degree right out of high school. Though by most people’s standards, I suppose my ex husband and I were poor, I did not know this since I was a good money manager and it seemed we had more money than I had when growing up. I just never bought what I could not afford and I did not waste a lot of time “wanting” things that I could not afford. They were happy times and I would not trade those years with my young children for any career or a million dollars. (My ex did not have any college background either). If I got my degree before getting married and having kids, and got a job in teaching or whatever, then had kids, I would have likely continued to work, leaving my kids in day care or with a babysitter. For me, being home with those kids during their formative years is my most treasured memory. Working outside the home is more than time away from your children. I believe I would have been too tired and stressed when I got home to be the same kind of parent I was as a “stay at home mom.” I did work on my schooling when they were little but it really was not stressful doing it by independent learning. I suppose I’d be making more money by now (or at least I would have made more through the years when my kids were young) but I have enough to be comfortable so I simply have no regrets! Now, I must force myself through the work to get a Ph.D. Will I get satisfaction? I surely hope so. Will it be worth it? I have a concrete goal and I believe getting this degree will take me there. Would I do it for self-satisfaction only? No. As for a last bit of advice for PhiloScholar, you have come this far, you MUST finish your BS degree. As for moving on to your Masters, you might need to look at your options out there. There may be options that will not require you to get a Master’s degree. I sense that you like school less than I do. Some consider “putting off school” wasting good years but then again, if you can have a good life putting it off forever, well, there is something to think about!

 

Re: Re: Losing my "umpfh" and desire....

With all of the options, traditional day classes, night classes, weekend classes, online classes, and standardized tests, how can you say it is "tough"? If you go through life with your eyes and mind open you should be able to earn about 100 credits through standardized tests.

You are a philosophy student so I ask - if it was easier, would the degree have value? If anyone could get a bachelors degree without effort, would it have worth?

Stop whining and decide if a degree is something you want. Almost everyone hits a point where they do not know if they want to continue. Find the motivation and do it or ecide it is not worth it.

By the way, I have learned not to criticize a current system without having a suggest to improve it...what do you suggest?

Sorry, but I thought you needed some "tough love"

 

I love that quote!