Looking for a Bad Online MBA

I want a really bad online MBA.

I've had it with UMass--bunch of AACSB-accredited snobs! Does anyone have a suggestion for a really bad online MBA?

Criteria: must be obscenely overpriced, must not be accredited by any respectable agency this side of Liberia, and must allow the student to skate by either doing absolutely nothing whatever or via hiding in group projects as a free rider.

Suggestions?

 

OK, I'll bite. How 'bout these guys?

http://www.almedacollege.org/

 

You're kidding, right? I mean, I know you're not kidding about AACSB snobbery. That I know something about. But overpriced and unaccredited? C'mon.

If you seriously just want "MBA" behind your name, and have it be legit (and legal in places like Oregon); and if you'd rather spend your money on your kids and not on the degree, I cannot more strongly recommend the Ashworth MBA. DETC-accredited. Total cost is around $4,900 (payable in $99/month installments, interest-free); and that includes all books and any other study materials you could possibly need... making it the cheapest, by far, of the accredited MBA programs. Plus, it's completely open-enrollment (so you can start anytime); and it's about as flexible as they come in terms of you being able to pretty much study completely on your own schedule.

Ashworth, I've come to consider them, is sort of the Wal*Mart of accredited (albeit only nationally accredited) distance learning. In the areas, or with regard to its features, where it excels, it has no rival... not even Andrew Jackson University, which, in my opinion, is probably a little bit better DETC-accredited school, overall; is priced very similarly (except that it actually costs more because books, etc., are not included in the tuition); but is a bit less flexible in terms of your time.

If you're not kidding around (and I think maybe you must be), Ashworth's MBA is the only game in town... or so it is my opinion.

 

ALAMEDA:

Now that's not bad (er, not good)! I particularly like the AOAEX accreditation. Nice touch.

But the only problem is, it's so cheap. However, meets all other criteria splendidly. Bad, deliciously bad!

 

Why don't you just say you have one?

 

Re: Re: Looking for a Bad Online MBA

Actually, I was just joking.

Spend my money on the kids? You kidding? After this degree is done, I'll probably pursue some ultra-high-priced doctorate from the likes of Manchester or Aston or Henley--let the kids fend for themselves. They need to learn it's a rough world anyway!

 

But I need to make up a catchy name for both my school and my accrediting body. The catch is the names must have that particular millish touch that indicates to all concerned that they were devised by, say, a real estate agent in the Pacific Northwest or a pseudo-professor with a pseudo-PhD from a French psuedo-university.

I'll start with a school name: National International School of Management and Cosmetology.

Any ideas for an accrediting body? Or other ideas for the school name?

 

How about:

The Rocco-Sluggo institute of International Management and Typewriter Repair

You must admit RSIIMTR has a certain something about it...

 

Sorry for your troubles little. Here's a link that may help you to sing the blues. If you think that you feel bad now, just wait until you try to use this degree.

http://www.knightsbridgeuniversity.com
(they'll sell you any degree you want)
Jack

 

No, No....you've got to make it sound like a LEGIT school so as to confuse HR people and customers....Like instead of University of Texas...have the Texas University.

OR you could mix a couple of known schools names kind of like Notre Yale!!!

Or you could come up with something ultra catchy like the Donald Trumpp School of Business. Notice the two "P"s on there, intentional, that away you have a lawsuit defense angle. You can claim you named your school after a Norwegian milk cow that was very popular in Pennsylvania during the 1700's.


Then you simply MUST confuse people with an accrediting body like the Distance Learning Education Council. The DLEC instead of the DETC or the like...and you can claim to be recognized as a LEGAL school in your state....offering life learning degrees. Be sure to place a picture of your diploma on your web site.

And to give it a slightly millish touch...have an advertisement pop up when people go to your site. Preferably an ad to a porn site.

 

Friendorfoe

That's a good one!

 

fauss:

A train name maybe like University of Denver and the Rio Grande or Atchison Topeka and Santa Fe College.

Accreditation by World Association of Unaccredited Colleges(WAUC).

 

Kind of like the Burlington Northern School of Business?

I still like Notre Yale.

 

That's all just genius.

You're absolutely right. It has to have that feel to it that indicates the person tried very hard to make it look legit, but ultimately had no clue about the matter.

How about Oklahoma Coastal University (Many of the foreign dupes--er, students--would never know the difference), accredited by the Council for American Accreditation Council?

 

I would be happy to print your diploma once you decide on the appropriate and legitimate sounding name for this school. I've been wanting to try some of that gold foil stuff.

 

Oh yeah....and you absolutely MUST have pictures on your site that are the obligatory:

1.) White male looking smug like he's achieved something you haven't.

2.) Asian female sitting at a laptop sipping coffee while looking intently at the screen (shhhhh....she's studying)

3.) African American male along with a small group of culturally diverse persons all wearing black graduation gowns and smiling and holding a roll of paper meant to look like a diploma (of course you don't actually have a graduation...but who cares)

4.) White female pouring over books while her child politely plays with a little plastic red truck in the foreground.

You get the idea.


I like Oklahoma Coast University. How about the Colorado Coast Columbia School of Business? Awesome.

 

How about the Hawaii Atlantic University.
Mele kalikimaka College of Business

It can be accrediated by the Higher Learning Association of the Southern Association of independant schools and colleges

 

Real possibilities there. Perhaps the Union Pacific School of Management or Central Pacific School of Management.

Campus address: a Mailboxes Etc. located in Promontory Point, Utah.

 

Are you a printer by trade? Or perhaps have a very good laser printer? You really should print something up--gold foil and all--that incorporates some of our ridiculous-sounding names, really lampoon the whole thing. Then take a picture of it and put a link here. Maybe you could make a little sidelight out of it, sell them on the net (just so long as you don't make anything look actually semi-legit--don't want to have the feds come knocking).

 

Well then we have to come to agreement on a school name.

I personally would like to have a PhD in Absurdity.

Then I could be Dr. Absurd.