Distance Learning Joke

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussions' started by Coyberaser, Jul 12, 2002.

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  1. Coyberaser

    Coyberaser New Member

    So a Rabbi, a Priest, and a duck are sitting around in the reception room of a dental office in Oneonta, New York, reading magazines, while waiting for their appointments.

    The Rabbi is reading The Economist, sees an ad from Century University offering fully accredited Ph.D. degrees by distance learning. He slaps his forelock and starts wailing, "Oyyyyy, oyyyy, oyyyyy." "What's the matter?" the Priest inquires. The Rabbi says, "Oyyyy, oyyyy, oyyyy, the years I spent in yeshiva, studying 18 hours a day, seven days a week, to earn my qualification, and look, here's a place where I could have done it in my spare time in just a few months."

    The Priest and the duck commiserate with him, and go on with their reading.

    The Priest is reading Psychology Today, and sees an ad from the International University for Fundamentalist Studies. He starts rattling his rosary, and starts moaning, "Oooooooh, ooooooh, ooooooh." "What is it? What happened?" the Rabbi inquires. "Ooooooh, oooooooh," goes the Priest. "Fourteen years at the Seminary, those 4 a.m. matins, the endless studies, all those cold showers before the Boys Choir rehearsals, and look, I could have been ordained in a matter of days."

    The Rabbi and the duck commiserate with him, and go on with their reading.

    After a while, the duck, who is reading the New York Times, drops the paper as if it were on fire, and goes, "Quack quack quack quack quack quack quack." Alarmed, the Rabbi and the Priest look up and say, almost in unison, "What is it? What is it? What happened?"

    "Look at this," the duck squawks, pointing at


    ALERT! Your time at this NP Internet Access terminal is about to expire. Please deposit at least $1 for ten additional minutes.
     
  2. EllisZ

    EllisZ Member

    The priest & cold shower thing was a uncalled for cheap shot that did nothing to add to the joke.


    (To everyone else: I know ... I sound ornery lately .... I apologize.)
     
  3. wfready

    wfready New Member


    Right, whatever. Don't apologize, just don't do it. Its a joke, man.

    Bill
     
  4. Homer

    Homer New Member

    Cheap, indeed.............timely, though.
     
  5. EllisZ

    EllisZ Member


    It would be a joke if it had a humorous climax.

    And perhaps you are right ... I withdrawal the apology.
     
  6. qjackson

    qjackson New Member

    Looks like someone ran out of pocket change! Perhaps the umpteen thousand dollars/credit they spent on their RA degree has them up to their ears in debt. ;-)

    (Running and "duck" ing.)
     
  7. John Bear

    John Bear Senior Member

    Yeah, I would probably have said something impolite about saltpeter in the gruel.

    (Do conservative distance learning high schools mail packets of saltpeter to their male students?)

    (The only coin-op internet terminal I've ever used was in Mongolia last year, so I don't know how typical it was, but it is hard to imagine one that would actually put a message on a screen like that. Perhaps the writer copied and pasted it somehow?)
     
  8. Bill Huffman

    Bill Huffman Well-Known Member

    That was my favorite part of the joke!

    "Comedy is cruel"
    Steve Martin, 1975
     
  9. irat

    irat New Member

    lost you at the bakery?
    LoL :)
     

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