Starting the new school year, but need some positive vibes and prayers.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussions' started by LittleShakespeare90, Sep 5, 2022.

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  1. Dear friends,

    I hope this post finds you all well and you are staying safe! I wanted to write to you with an update, but I also needed some words of wisdom or some advice.

    The last time I wrote to you, I was going to defer my admission to the PhD in English at Old Dominion University. I am burned out from being a high school English teacher, so I figured I should switch careers and become a high school librarian. Long story short: I decided not to go for the master's degree in library science. I love literature too much, and I feel that library science won't give me the opportunity to work with literature in the same capacity.

    After weeks and weeks of career counseling, I think I would like to be a college professor. My dream has always been to go for my PhD, so I decided to start ODU's program this fall. I started classes last week, and I am totally in love. I love the coursework, and I am so honored they picked me to be a part of this program. :emoji_blue_heart: But something else happened too! The high school where I currently work is offering to pay for my PhD. Therefore, I couldn't quit my job.

    I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed. I need my high school job to pay for my doctorate, but I have so much work to do in that job. I also want to be a good student and pursue my doctorate with flying colors. I just don't know how I can handle both. My family puts a lot of pressure on me to succeed, and sometimes, it leads me to bite off more than I can chew. I've been having panic attacks all weekend because I'm afraid that something bad is going to happen and that I cannot handle both my stressful teaching job and my beloved PhD.

    Please send me some advice or prayers. I could really use them now. Thank you so much for everything. :emoji_heart:
     
    Charles Fout and Dustin like this.
  2. Johann

    Johann Well-Known Member

    Your family is at fault here, not you. That's totally WRONG. It's affecting your health and it has to stop - NOW.
    You do you. And if you have to distance yourself from them for a while over this pressure - so be it. No guilt. None.

    You know what you want. You can get this done. Your way. Family pressure is not family support. If they can't give you what you need (support) - let them give you nothing at all - including pressure.

    Your school has offered you the classic golden handcuffs bribe. "All that glisters is not gold." ( (William Shakespeare, Merchant of Venice, Act II Scene 7) :)
     
  3. Johann

    Johann Well-Known Member

    I'm not saying outright DON'T take the school's offer. Consider it, for sure. But certainly, don't consent for reasons of pressure. This is YOU - not somebody else. Totally YOU. You have my heartfelt good wishes. I encourage those others who believe in the power of prayer, to pray for you.
     
    LittleShakespeare90 likes this.
  4. tadj

    tadj Active Member

    You should also consider the fact that college teaching can likewise lead to high burnout. If you are burned out from being a high school English teacher, the other profession may have similar challenges ahead.

    "In the United States, 44% of teachers in K-12 education said they very often or always feel burned out at work, while for college or university teachers, the figure was 35%. These are the top two occupations among 14 listed in the 2022 Gallup Poll on occupational burnout." (link: https://research.com/education/teacher-burnout-challenges-in-k-12-and-higher-education)
     
    LittleShakespeare90 likes this.
  5. AsianStew

    AsianStew Moderator Staff Member

    You need to decide, before you do, relax a bit, you know what you want already... HS teacher < Librarian < Professor... Now, if you are full time, is there an option for 'part-time' or changing positions in the schools where it'll be easier? Sometimes if you don't have many commitments you may be able to work on both and see how much time each will take. For example, work F/T HS teaching and take the minimum required for the PhD in the first semester and see how you figure out your time management, don't take a full course load, but a partial minimum, if it's not working out for you, then you'll know which one to put off for the time being.
     
    LittleShakespeare90 likes this.
  6. Asymptote

    Asymptote Active Member

    Sounds pretty sweet for a HS to pay for a doctorate! Does the HS also allow for sabbaticals? Some schools do, so maybe that is a way to leverage the time commitment?
     
    LittleShakespeare90 likes this.
  7. Johann

    Johann Well-Known Member

    I think the school is doing everything it can think of, for ONE reason only - to keep a good teacher. Unfortunately, that teacher feels she is burned out by the job. My take: I don't think any deal will cure burnout. Or alter the environment that produced it. I'd be wary here - of any pressure or suggestion to stay on, for any specific time that might not work for that good teacher.

    I think it could get ugly if the School Board pays for the doctorate and LittleShakespeare90 then says "thanks and goodbye." They WANT something for their money. This isn't altruism. Neither School Boards nor other employers even know the meaning of that concept. :(

    @LittleShakespeare90 But it's YOUR decision - not mine. Whatever you decide, I have infinite confidence it will be right for YOU -you brilliant person!
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2022
    LittleShakespeare90 likes this.
  8. Rachel83az

    Rachel83az Well-Known Member

    You said you did career counseling, but have you done actual counseling/therapy? It sounds like you might need it. A qualified therapist would be in a better position to advise you about burnout, biting off more than you can chew, etc. than a bunch of internet strangers. There is only so much we can know/do.
     
  9. mattbrent

    mattbrent Well-Known Member

    As a Virginian who works in the community college system, I've known a few folks who have done ODU's program. It's no joke, and while I have not done that specific program, I will share one tidbit that I found helpful during my own doctoral journey. Find a community of students in the program. We actually didn't have one for UC, so Steve Foerster created one. It was nice to be able to talk about things with peers. My wife and friends just didn't get it like that group did.

    My best to you!
     
  10. Johann

    Johann Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Rachel, for once again, being the voice of reason. It's been refreshing for all of us - including our friend LittleShakespeare90 - to be in sharp contrast with the sour people she encountered on the grad forum. But this is becoming a situation where a professional could do more good than we can. Not that we shouldn't continue to be supportive to our friend. But it looks like she could really use some professional advice in addition to our good wishes and general expressions of friendship.

    I'm going to be off the board for a few months at least (have studying to do, myself) and I wish everyone here the best, including of course, LittleShakespeare90. "My necessaries are embark'd: farewell." (Hamlet.)
     
  11. Thank you so much, my dear friends! I am so grateful for your help and for your guidance. You are truly paragons! :emoji_purple_heart:
     
    Dustin likes this.
  12. Dear friends,

    I hope you're doing well and having a glorious Monday morning! I just wanted to write to you with an update.

    Work has been going pretty well. I'm trying to get my anxiety under control so I can be the best possible teacher for those kids. Therapy and medications have been helping. I just feel that I bit off more than I can chew with my PhD classes, so during this ADD/DROP week, I think I'm going to drop a class. I just want to focus on getting healthy while pursuing my doctorate dream. So, I'll be taking one class at night and teach high school during the day. The class is only once a week, and I think the reading/homework should be doable.

    Thank you so much for always helping me out and listening. You have my deepest gratitude, and I am so lucky to have found you all! Wishing you a spectacular start to the week!
     
    Tireman 44444 and Dustin like this.

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