Easy, cheap, fast doctorate?

Discussion in 'General Distance Learning Discussions' started by DegreeDazed, Aug 16, 2013.

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  1. DegreeDazed

    DegreeDazed Member

    I'm looking for a very specific doctorate degree and I was wondering if anyone could point me in the right direction. Here are my requirements.

    I don't have much money, so it has to be really cheap. I don't want to write a dissertation or work all that hard at it because I'm busy with other things. It has to be regionally accredited. I do NOT want some fake degree from a degree mill, I want a real doctorate that will get me a position in academia.

    My goal is to become a professor, with tenure, at a university. Which school should I choose?
     
  2. LGFlood

    LGFlood New Member

    Okay, I can't quite tell if you are asking this tongue-in-cheek or are making a serious inquiry. While it seems to be the former, I will still go with the latter just in case.

    In a nutshell, to teach as "a professor, with tenure, at a university," you will need a Ph.D. As this is a research degree, you will not escape without a dissertation. A dissertation is also required in the majority of other doctorates, as well. I believe the only exception to this would be certain professional doctorates.

    The bottom line is if you are looking for a doctorate from an RA school, you will have to write a dissertation. And as far as not "working all that hard at it," nevermind, I just realized this HAS to be a spoof. :)
     
  3. GoodYellowDogs

    GoodYellowDogs New Member

    Let's hope it's a joke...
     
  4. TEKMAN

    TEKMAN Semper Fi!

    If it is cheap, then you have to attend full-time on campus to get free tuition and stipend while teaching or researching for the institution. If it is easy for Doctorate degree, then half of the American population already have Doctorate degrees. Because it is hard, therefore only 2% of Americans have Doctorate degrees. If you do not want to write, then Doctorate degree is not for you. You will not learn much in the Doctorate degree in your field, but program will help you to transfer a practitioner to scholar.

    Since you do not want to write DISSERTATION, then you should apply for British or Australian schools. I don't use the term DISSERTATION for Doctorate, but they use THESIS.
     
  5. ryoder

    ryoder New Member

    Time, quality, cost. Pick one.
     
  6. sanantone

    sanantone Well-Known Member

    ^^ I think the OP can get two of those. Arizona State University's DBH can be done under 2 years, and it has an applied project instead of a dissertation. But, the program is about $45,000. They now have a management track that does not require master's level licensure in a healthcare field.

    I found some other programs with research projects instead of dissertations, but they could be almost as involved as dissertations. See this thread.
    http://www.degreeinfo.com/general-distance-learning-discussions/44403-online-doctoral-programs-no-dissertation.html

    Valdosta State University is cheap. They will apply up to 15 credits from your master's degree leaving you with 39 credits to complete for the DPA. The program has an applied project instead of a dissertation.
    http://ww2.valdosta.edu/pa/mpa/DPAProgramRequirements.shtml
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 16, 2013
  7. friendorfoe

    friendorfoe Active Member

    I want a Ferrari, but I don’t have much money, so it has to be cheap, like as in under $10,000. Also it has to be brand new and 100% functional. I don’t actually want to have to buy and pump gas into it, so it has to come with a magic engine that runs on fairy dust. I want to use it to be a Sprint Car racer, even though this technically isn’t the right kind of car. I also want the car to be fully equipped with a well-endowed blonde woman who loves fat, bald, broke guys, and threesomes. Oh yeah, and I’d like it in red. Anyone?
     
  8. Maniac Craniac

    Maniac Craniac Moderator Staff Member

    Personally, I'm looking for a language that will learn itself for me.

    Sorry to pile on, OP, but I do have to question if an "easy" dissertation-free doctorate is a realistic gateway into academia if you can even find one that fits all of your criteria.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 16, 2013
  9. SteveFoerster

    SteveFoerster Resident Gadfly Staff Member

    I think s/he was kidding.
     
  10. Damnation

    Damnation New Member

    lol i actually thought OP was asking which school he/she should teach in...
     
  11. Ted Heiks

    Ted Heiks Moderator and Distinguished Senior Member

    If you don't want to write a dissertation, you could always go for as first professional degree with the doctoral title, such as a JD or an MD, but it won't be easy.
     
  12. RFValve

    RFValve Well-Known Member

    I guess the OP forgot to mention that the position has to be at a University that is in a metro area as he or she is not willing to move to a small city and at a University that is AACSB accredited as he or she is not willing to take anything less than 100K salary to start.

    Every week there are two or more of these requests. The OP might just want to do a search and will find hundreds of threads in this topic.

    The answer is NONE.
     
  13. Kizmet

    Kizmet Moderator

    I just want the money for all that. And I don't want to pay taxes on it.:cool:
     
  14. Rich Douglas

    Rich Douglas Well-Known Member

    That one, of course.
     
  15. truckie270

    truckie270 New Member

    There is no difference in terms of amount of work. Everyone on my committee bristled at the fact that the decision was made to call it an applied project rather than a dissertation in the roll-out of the DPA. They made no bones about the fact that they expected a dissertation-level effort no matter what the end product was called.
     
  16. truckie270

    truckie270 New Member

    Don't forget - tenure-track but work from home, no committee assignments, and absolutely no publishing or research work required.
     
  17. cookderosa

    cookderosa Resident Chef

    Nut-huh. Really? LOL. My favorite part of the question is where the requirement list doesn't include the discipline. Ha ha ha...good one. Seriously, made my morning.

    EDIT: I've decided to add a hearty ME TOO to my comments.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 16, 2013
  18. Rich Douglas

    Rich Douglas Well-Known Member

    Good for them. But I wonder if they made any distinctions regarding the project/dissertation? For example, as a professional doctorate, the DPA could accommodate research that is practical in nature, is workplace-based, and doesn't necessarily prove and/or change theory. Or they could just complain and then keep expecting the same outputs from these very different students. That would be my guess.
     
  19. truckie270

    truckie270 New Member

    Actually, the distinctions are spelled out quite clearly. The main point of frustration that I saw, at least among my committee members, was that using an applied project was that it gave the impression that somehow the level of work and attention to detail would less than that of a dissertation. In their defense, I did see some initial products from some classmates that I would not consider anything more than a complex work project.
     
  20. DegreeDazed

    DegreeDazed Member

    Why are you nasty people making fun of me? I know that professors don't work very hard, have very little pressure and make tons of money. That's why I'm looking for a cheap, easy doctorate so I can be a professor and live a life of wealth and ease. What is wrong with that?
     

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