Socialism: You have two cows. Give one cow to your neighbor. Communism: You have two cows. Give both cows to the government and they might give you some of the milk. Fascism: You have two cows. You give all of the milk to the government and the government sells it. Nazism: You have two cows. The government shoots you and takes both cows. Anarchism: You have two cows. Keep both of the cows, shoot the government agent and steal another cow. Capitalism: You have two cows. Sell one cow and buy a bull. Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government makes you take harmonica lessons.