Headline in today's Chronicle of Higher Education: Transylvania U. Dismisses 3 Communications Employees When reached for comment, university President Vlad Dracula said . . .
"They forgot to announce the correct sunrise and sunset times. Chaos ensued." "I had to. The university's stakeholders demanded it." "Maybe I was too hasty. Ever since I turned 800, I've been a little cranky." "Now, about that idiot Renfield." "They failed the pre-employment blood test. They still had some." "Had to. They'd become a pain in the neck." "I'm not sure whether it will improve things, or if it's just all in vein." "I waited as long as I could, but the situation became too grave." "Wait until you see what I come up with necks."
The name "Transylvania" literally means "Beyond the forest". It usually refers to western Romania, but in the late 1700's, it was used in the southern US to refer to the areas on the far (west) side of the Appalachian mountains, particularly the area now recognized as central Kentucky. The first college in that area was established in 1780, and so it was named "Transylvania University". The name "Transylvania" obviously didn't stick in Kentucky -- but there is still a Transylvania County in western North Carolina (their marketing slogan: "Transylvania County - Just Bite Me")
