Home Schooling

I am just starting to delve into this subject, which is of interest to me for several reasons (a) the online component, and (b) the communities surrounding this phenomenon. I was talking to a Marine in my office yesterday about the schools in Virgina, and asked about his children. He explained that after arriving in NOVA, and sitting in school for a day with a teacher, he came to the conclusion that home schooling would be best. His MIL is a math teacher and was against the entire idea, but she became a convert after she saw how her grandchildren are doing. They are TAG and ahead of thier peers, plus the youngest is a little shy. In his area, the homeschoolers have a little consortium! Good Stuff! :wink:

 

There are a number of home schoolers on Degreeinfo (and estimated at well over 2 million country wide). Home schooling is extremely diversified, ranging from highly-structured to "unschooling" (i.e. using the world, rather than the classroom, as the learning environment). Research over the past few decades has indicated that home-educated children are not academically disadvantaged compared to thier public and private-schooled peers and there is no data to confirm the stereotype that home-educated children are less socially adept than their peers.

 

But everybody always knows this one weird kid who was home-schooled and they are so sure that all of the rest of them must be like that. I always reply to the "not very social" crowd that yeah home schooled kids miss out on all the great social stuff like bullying, which clothes are the "right" ones to wear, cliques, germs, etc. Yeah, schools are real social places.

I've found that a lot of people who home school are very religous and feel that is the reason they need to home school. That being said, there are now more groups of secular parents who are into home schooling.

The home schooled kid I knew? He was in the Marines with me. Real weird kid...scored a 99 on his ASVAb test, Scout/Sniper, selected for 8th and I (very prestigous Presidential duty in Washington DC).

I'm a fan of home schooled kids, just like I'm a fan of Mormon kids. You know the ones that knock on your door? Invite them in and give them some lemonade, I'm not interested in their religion, they are intelligent fine upstanding people. I have met a lot of Mormon kids and to a one, they are all smart young men-I'm impressed and a little weirded out by it. I've met some great home schooled kids too.

My kids attend public school.

 

this made me laugh, so very true. I know more than one. We homeschool- we are in year 15. That said, my stock comeback when asked about socialization (which admittedly, hasn't happened much lately ) is "I homeschool FOR the socialization." It takes most people a few minutes. Not everyone gets it. That's okay. It's the truth.

I look at socialization as a deliberate process of ushering your children into an interacting world - where people are all ages, all shapes, all colors, all social strata, and all religions; Being of the world but maintaining an identity, bringing a view to the table, participating in social and cultural norms. I don't define socialization as random result of grouping children together by age, religion, or neighborhood...but that's just me. Of course, if that worked, we'd have 95% of the school age children demonstrating excellent social skills. Nuff said.

 

I'll bet that everyone also knows some weird that goes (or went) to their school, who seemed to lack social skills. The difference is that no one says of that kid "Oh, is not well socialized because he went to public school"

For a few years, my family attended (and I presented at) the InHome Conference in Illinois. There were over 1,000 attendees (parents and children), including the very religious, the very secular and everything in between. Most of the organized home schooling groups of which I am aware are Christian-oriented, but, as you state, other groups are becoming more numerous.

Frankly, I think that I would want him watching my back. Having a sniper as a friend can be advantageous

As one of those who spent two years as a volunteer Mormon Missionary (and who has a daughter who just completed a mission), I am grateful for people like you who are kind and respectful to those of other faiths.

I attended a good public school and my kids have had a combination of a charter school and homeschooling. They have been better prepared for college (and adult life) than I was.

 

Growing up I received a variety of schooling, including public school, Christian-based private school, home schooling, and no school at all. I am of the opinion that like most things, one gets out of it what one puts in to it. Except that for home-schooling it is usually at least two, not one (parent and child). It can be great learning experience or it can be a waste of a child's life. The home-schooling groups/clubs I have heard about sound like a great idea to me although I have no experience with them. I wouldn't say home-schooling is better for everyone though; some parents and students simply won't do well at it. Just like some people won't do well at distance learning. But some will thrive.

 

My community, for being so rural, has a large number of homeschoolers. Many of them end up coming to the high school when they reach that age. In my 7 years here, I've noticed a few things. This not based on any psychological data or anything, just my observations.

In our community, I'd say we could break homeschoolers into three groups. Group A is part of the homeschool network, in which there's a group of homeschool kids that meet together for class and someone teaches them. Group B are the homeschoolers who sit at home with their parents or some other individual and are taught. Group C are the homeschoolers who are simply given books and told to read.

I've noticed that students homeschooled for religious reasons tend to be "socially awkward" and they tend to be very closed minded. In our area these folks tend to be LDS or Catholic. The evangelicals seem to be part of Group A, and since they intermingle with others, I guess they just don't have that awkwardness.

When I look at the three groups, Group A seems to be the most academically advanced, followed by Group B, and finally Group C. It's the Group C folks that make me think there needs to be some sort of oversight. Many times, based on my observations, these kids are far behind their peers. It just seems unjust to keep a kid at home, depriving him from any education at all, and then not teaching him yourself.

On a side note, we got a new superintendent this year, and he was amazed at the number of homeschoolers in our county. To him it raised a red flag that something must not be right. As an insider, I know our schools aren't perfect, but this is mostly due to the large numbers of impoverished families we have who are simply not investing in their children's education. These students are the discipline problems and those who are academically behind. Were I an outsider, I'm not sure I'd want my kids going to school with them either, seeing how they act.

My daughter recently turned four. My wife and I are really worried about what to do with her. She's very advanced for her age, and I'm worried if she's plopped in with those students who are behind, she'll end up being held back. We've got another year and a half to decide, and I'm hoping things improve with our new superintendent.

-Matt

 

Homeschooling allows children to work at the pace that works best for them. They are not "held back" by their classmates. My wife was homeschooled 30 years ago when it was quite rare. Our 6 children are (or will be) homeschooled. They outperform their peers across the board academically. They are more involved in civic events than their public schooled peers.

 

There is no question that home schooling can work out well for everyone involved. However, my experience (as an interested observer) is that many kids are home schooled by parents who have no idea how to teach anyone anything. The kid winds up doing workbooks bought from wal-mart while the parent watches the price is right. I believe that the best way to learn is with a tutor (e.g. a parent) who has mastered the material themselves and can present it in a creative way that is geared to the individual kid. I don't know that this is the most common manner in which kids are home schooled. I'm glad that some have had good experiences with home schooling. I'm just uncertain that a few good experiences represent the majority.

 

When I taught high school, this one year I got this really nice, bright young boy in my class. He seemed to fit in well, and had friends. The only thing different about him was that he had manners, and was respectful, and yes it was that noticeable. It was later in the year at an open house or something that I talked to his mother and learned that he had never been to "school" until that year...11th grade in high school. He was brighter than most in the course I was teaching (C++ programming).

I ended up homeschooling my own son through 9th and 10th grade. My fellow teachers were often horrified and the comment I heard most was "but what about his socialization?"

My son was a gifted social mis-fit in school, and every year it seemed to get a little bit worse than it was the year before, until things came to a head at the end of 9th grade and I knew I could not keep him in that school for three more years. Something had to give.


My question to the nay sayers is this: If public school did not "fix" or teach my son proper socialization skills by the end of ninth grade, should I have expected that in three more years, they would finally have him properly socialized? (in spite of the fact that I would say the situation became worse every single year he was in school).

Not that I needed to defend this to the nay-sayers (mostly teachers) but we did have social outings that were well supervised and structured, and I think it was a great experience, getting to know other homeschoolers.

My son went to a private boarding school for his senior year, and it worked out okay for him.

 

But what about his "indoctrination"

 

Of course, with such a large and varied population, it is difficult to make gneralities about all home-schooled students (just as it is about all public- or private-schooled students). The best data that we have from multiple studies conducted during the past few decades is that home-school children tend, on average, to match or exceed their public or private school peers on most measures of achievement. Also, the studies that have been done on the socialization of home schoolers shows that they are no less socialized than their public or private schooled peers, other than demonstrating less peer-dependence.

 

Not only do homeschooled kids routinely outperform public school children on most measures of achievement, there is evidence that when homeschooled kids go to college, they continue to outperform:

Can Homeschoolers Do Well in College? - CBS News

As someone who has been homeschooling for 14 years now, I get tired of reading and hearing about the negative stereotypes of homeschooling parents/children. Sure, there are poor homeschooling parents, but there are also poor teachers/public schools also. Would it be fair to find a poorly performing student and paint him/her as the public school stereotype?

 

I think it is great. It reduces the burden on federal and state governments and seems to be as effective as uber-expensive public education that just keeps getting more expensive every year. I was homeschooled at 3-4 years old before kindergarten and was reading on a 3rd grade level by my first day in kindergarten. My learning dropped dramatically after entering into the government school system.

 

I think it's interesting that non-homeschool families (no disrespect, i'm simply creating a classification) tend to discuss academics and socialization in such a different context than I see it.

As a homeschooler, I'll say that the academics are a no-brainer. Sorry, but it's true. The bar is so low, that you could wake up at noon every day, spend 2 hours on "school" and still pump out kids that score at or above grade level. I see it every day. In 17 years I've met looottttsss of homeschoolers. I tend to be a little more structured on the spectrum, but that's because I have 4 and need to keep all the rings of my circus running smoothly. @Kizmet, I've used a few Walmart workbooks in my day. I've also spend $$$,$$$ on curriculum through the years. Curriculum is irrelevant. You could teach with nothing or the best, it's so entirely unimportant that I won't even go there.

Socialization? Let's figure this out. Let's calculate this- K-12 in an average district is 175 days per year. If an average school day is 7 hours per day, that's 175*7 = 1225 hours per year. So, for 1225 hours per year, your child is being socialized somewhere by someone. It's happening no matter what. Over an entire educational career, that's 1225 * 13 = 16,000 contact hours. 16 THOUSAND.

IMO, you can't ignore 16,000 hours of anything. Homeschooling isn't about academics, it's about what's going on and NOT going on for 16 thousand hours of a developing child's life. How that child merges into society and attaches to a family.

I live in an excellent school district (by rank measure, we are top 5% in the state of Illinois) but for me, seriously, academics are really NOT the reason we homeschool. They were in the beginning, before I appreciated the dynamics of what we were creating. Now, we do homeschool for the socialization. I have amazing kids. AMAZING. They are amazing people who will do great things in their world. They also know how to read and do math.

 

Jennifer mentions time in her post above, and I think that's important. I remember when I was working on my MSEd, we read a bunch of articles about the actual amount of time teaching versus managing the classroom. So much time is lost in the disciplinary process. I could only imagine what it would be like if I could actually spend my 53 minutes per class actually teaching, but instead I have to deal with the misfits who are ruining it for the other kids. Many of these kids have been socially promoted forever and ever, and thus they don't have the skills necessary to function academically at the high school level. It's a lose-lose situation for everyone.

When I first started teaching I was completely against homeschooling, but now that I see what my own children would have to deal with (and this could be solely based on my own community, which is where I choose to live) I'm more supportive of the practice. If only all students, homeschooled or not, had caring parents, then we'd be in business.

-Matt

 

Whoa! the day that Matt decides to homeschool, I'll, well, I'll..... I don't know what I'll do lol. I remember back in the day you and I having a few heated discussions about homeschool- of course that was before we were friends and before you had kids. Still, shocking to hear you say the above.
Seriously though, I hear ya. I'm really not a homeschool activist, I do it- because it works for us- and I know it works for some (not all) families too. It isn't a one-size-fits-all cure either. There are cons. That said, I really appreciate your mind opening to the IDEA of doing what's best for your child, I think that's the place that "most" homeschoolers come from when they start homeschooling. I think most people are genuine and sincere in their efforts and motives. For that reason, some people stop homeschooling and begin using the public or private systems. There are options. Good for you for considering all of them. That's the mark of a good dad

 

The thing, public education is the greatest idea in the world. When we started it America became the most literate nation in the world and the number one producer. Then the government got more and more involved, and we end up today with politicians knowing more about how education should work that the people who actually work in the field.

If we could return to the way things were when I was in school, I'd have my kids in public school in a heartbeat. Our schools aren't bad, don't get me wrong. I just hate how all the laws now force teachers to cater to the lowest common demoninator. Let's face it. There are some kids that just aren't going to make it to college, and I HATE the fact that in America we have this idea that everyone must go to college to survive or else they'll spontaneously combust. There are plenty of folks who could benefit from vocational education, but we've totally written that off. It's like we're being forced to create student clones where everyone must regurgitate the same useless trivia on a standardized test. THAT is one reason I'm more supportive of homeschooling now! :yup:

-Matt

 

hi perrymk,

This is true that we wouldn't say home-schooling is better for everyone. This only depend upon the environment that students get.