While my degrees are in business and accounting, they are from colleges that stress a balanced and a wider perspective on issues both in related and not related to business.
Strike the word "in." I don't think what you have here is a run-on sentence. It's a complex sentence, but not grammatically incorrect. Flesch-Kincaid scores it at a grade level of 14.8. The only way to simplify it, I'm afraid, is to focus on a single idea. Perhaps this: "While my degrees are in business and accounting, they are from colleges that stress a wider perspective on issues not directly related to business." That still scores a 13.9 grade level, but it's easier to follow (IMHO).
lots of options.... While my degrees are in business and accounting, they are from colleges that stress both a balanced and wider perspective on issues both related and not related to business. While my degrees are in business and accounting, they are from colleges that stress both a balanced and wider perspective on business issues whether related or unrelated. ....wider perspective on issues of business, whether related or unrelated. ...wider perspective on issues of business, whether related or not.
I would also strike "and accounting" since that is part of business (unless your sentence is related to accounting)
What point are you trying to get across? That you have a broad liberal arts education in addition to your specialties? Though I majored in business and accounting, my colleges provided a broad liberal arts education with exposure to many disciplines.
That is exactly what I am trying to say. Here is my new cover letter in full. What suggestions or changes would you make. I would like to apply for the position of visiting business professor. I have spent over five years abroad teaching, three in Korea and two in Taiwan. I have a taught a wide variety of subject from beginners English as a Second Language (ESL) to science. My experiences in both countries have allowed me to keep an open mind and to be culturally aware of the nuisances of each culture and the unique needs of the individual students. While my degrees are in business and accounting, they are from colleges that stress a balanced perspective on issues not related to business. Some of these are helping people pursue their academic potential, develop leadership skills and cultivate their faith and spirituality. Likewise, these ideals and concepts learned from school have transferred to both my personal and professional life. Till this day, I continue to learn, whether it is formally or informally. I am currently enrolled in Dun and Bradstreet’s “Enterprise Cash Flow Management” and London Teachers Training College for an expert rating in grammar. I believe when a teacher stops learning, he truly stops teaching. Also, I believe in leading by example. I do this through community involvement as in giving books to underprivileged kids or setting up World of Angels charity to help cancer and Leukemia research. I continue to reflect and meditate each day to see how I can be a better person. I have included my resume and would be happy to send you any additional information that you request. I would be happy to meet with you for an interview at your earliest possible convenience. You can reach me the following ways:
